Let’s all agree on one thing.
2016 was a shit show.
From the turbulent political landscape in the U.K. and States to the multitude of celebrities passing away, there will be a collective sigh of relief when the clock strikes midnight.
For me, this was a record-breaking year of dates thanks to friends playing matchmaker, Instagram connections (or as the kids call it “sliding into my DM”) and joining the dating app Bumble.
As much as I would love to share each date, there is a fine line between over-sharing and respecting the other person who most of the time know about my blog. Maybe when I win the lottery and don’t give a schnitzel what anyone thinks then I will be more revealing.
Instead, let me share my top ten lessons learned from serial dating:
1. Dating in 2016 was a numbers game. 2017 will be a year of being more selective and getting to know someone through texting and phone calls before meeting in person.
2. You need to have a tough skin to join a dating app because “ghosting” is rampant compared to online dating.
3. If he’s sexually aggressive on date #1 (a la Ghomeshi style), he doesn’t respect you or women in general. AND RUN!!!
4. Physical, emotional and intellectual chemistry all play an important role in the courtship phase. Looks fade but honourable characteristics like trust, respect and compassion will sustain a relationship.
5. Compromise is different from sacrificing your values. Staying true to yourself will always trump trying to appease someone else.
6. Never leave the house without lipstick because that will be the time when you randomly bump into an ex.
7. The love for yourself is the greatest, most meaningful yet challenging relationship and it’s a life-long journey. Never stop growing and learning from mistakes and experiences. Ru Paul says it best,
If you don’t love yourself then how the hell can you love somebody else?
8. Sometimes, the universe introduces you to the wrong guy as a test to see if you’re really ready to meet the right guy. Or someone from the past to see if you’re really over him.
9. Coffee and drinks are easy choices for dates. If a guy plans the first date around something you enjoy like a visit to the museum then that shows his considerate and creative side.
10. The friends who consistently feed your soul with love, encouragement and positivity … remember to reciprocate the kindness and you’ll have a powerhouse tribe for life.
I can’t deny that it’s been an emotionally exhausting year from the high hopes of thinking someone might be Mr. Right to the diminishing realization that he isn’t the one or he’s just not that into me.
As I push 2016 to the finish line with my feather boa and friends, one thing remains … I will always be an eternal optimist and choose to keep hoping and believing that I will meet that special someone and keep smiling during this journey.
What is the biggest lesson you learned in 2016?